Random selection of words

Berkeley這種地方啊...

2007-10-19T23:01:00.000-07:00

我來到了一位老者家門前。老者開了門，看著我，問道：『怎麼了？為何如此憔悴？』我曰：『我去了Berkeley...』話還沒說完，只見老者面色驚惶。雖然眼裡泛著淡淡淚光，臉上卻勉強的擠出慈祥和藹的微笑。老者緩緩道：『不用說了，孩子...我都知道了，快進屋裡吧...』我道了謝，搖搖晃晃得踏進了老者家門。老者要過來扶我，可是我已經倒下了...

屋裡壁爐得火光照得我好溫暖，我倒在地上，臉上浮出一絲幸福得微笑...

2006-09-06T22:21:00.000-07:00

    Wow, the title actually means something. That's amazing.

    I wrote down the title first so I don't forget, later on, what I was thinking about, and what I was thinking about were auto flush and the ecosystem in a room... What the hell is that?

Building 60 is a new building at Mount San Antonio College. It's mainly for science classes. The first floor is pretty much for physics and engineering, the third floor is for chemistry, and everything else goes to the second floor. You'll think it's cool to take classes in a new building. You're right, it's cool in a degree, but the first thing I felt when I walk into the building is the feeling of getting lost in a hospital-like maze. There are way too much entrances for building 60. There are maybe 15 entrances, and everywhere looks the same in the building. I think this building was built by some evil biology professors as an experiment on humans. Just like the experiments that are usually done with mice, they want to see if we, the students, and some professors, can smell our way to the designated classroom. Every time I enter the building things are a little different, yet curiously familiar. For example, yesterday, I remembered there was a restroom, today it became an elevator. So I took the elevator up to the 3rd floor, and as the elevator door opened up, a toilet was revealed. I walked in, and began my dump taking process. I was peacefully taking my dump. All the sudden, I heard *ding!*. The elevator door opened up in front of me, a girl was standing there, surprised, screamed, slapped me in the face, and ran back to the elevator.

That never happened, I wrote that because it's funny.

I did, though, took a dump in that building (too much information?), and it was a pleasant experience. There's nothing feel like taking a dump in a brand new public restroom. Firstly, NOTHING was written/carved on the wall! You'll never need to bring magazines to a public restroom because there are always enough things to read on the wall, on the floor, on the toilet seat, and sometimes on the ceiling, but not this one. I got pissed because there were nothing for me to read, so I drew the first blood. I carved my big ass name on the door. No I didn't, I lied. Secondly, The a/c in that restroom is ridiculously cold, which is a good thing, since dump taking is a physical-demanding activity.

The urinals are equipped with auto-flush/manual-flush dual action. Oh, and the drinking fountain, which amazingly was not located near the restroom, has motion sensor, too. Which is kind of neat.

What does the word "auto-flush" means to a girl? I can never ask something like that directly, because girls seem always in the mood of slapping me in the face. Just in case there are actually people reading this and don't know that the hell auto-flush is, I'm going to lecture for a second. Long before motion sensor for faucet was introduced to the world, we already had motion sensor attached to our urinal. That means, after we pee, the toilets flush by themselves. Shocking, isn't it?

So, the idea behind all these auto-flush, auto water, auto soap, and, in some airports and restaurants, auto paper towel dispenser is a hand-free restroom environment. You don't have to touch anything except your body, the water, the soap, and the paper towel in a restroom equipped with all the automated equipments. Pretty soon, you won't need to touch anything at all. You can just stand in front of the toilet, wave your hand in front of a sensor. There are going to be arms sticking out from the wall. They will lower your pants for your, grab whatever is needed in place, and you can just go ahead and pee, no hand! The next generation of hand free toilet will even have a sucker which will gently suck your urine out for you. You just magically wave your hand across the sensor and let the machine do all the work for you. Then, they'll begin to integrate the hand free restroom with classroom. Now, you don't even have to leave the seat. You just wave your hand, the seat will lift you up, drag you to the restroom to the toilet, lower your pants, suck things out of you, put your pants back on, and drag you back to the classroom. No hand!

There will be screw ups... Hmm... and abuses... Hmm...

Bedroom ecosystem? what bedroom ecosystem?

2006-09-02T09:11:00.000-07:00

Last entry was... 3 days ago. I am a fucking slacker. I deserve it, but can you blame me? First, there's no consequence for not entering. The school has started, and I'm tired every fucking day when school's over, therefore I don't have the energy to write journal every day. Secondly, I don't have the time either. In average, I got home at around 8:00 p.m.. I need to eat, take a shower, study (?), and procrastinate. After all these (especially after procrastination), I'm tired and need to sleep. Thursday is the worse, when I have to work till 10:30 p.m.. For the days when I do come home relatively earlier, I have to watch the Simpsons, so I still don't have time.

    Well, excuses after excuses, I have, but at least I'm find excuses. That means I actually (somehow) care about this, other wise I wouldn't bother finding one.

    is it obvious that it took more than 2 days to finish this entry...? Shame on me. today's date: 9/2/2006.... THE END!!!

2006-09-02T09:10:00.000-07:00

Who works on Saturday? The mythological creatures lives in mystery land of working on Saturday exist in the parallel universe of Saturday workers? Of course, they do. Oh, yeah, and one more person named John. No, no, not just any John, it has to be *this* John.
John Wang (a.k.a. Cheng-Lun Wang)
Height: 170 cm
Weight: Increasing
D.O.B: April, 26, 2006
Blood Type: B
Hair Colour: Black
Eye Colour: Black
Ethnicity: Asian/Chinese
Sexual Orientation: not gay~
Single...
Who is currently studying in Mount San Antonio College preparing to transfer to UCLA as a computer science major. And who, at the moment, is feeling blue.

One thing that sucks the most is that I have to cross a desert to get my food since nothing on campus opens on Saturday, oh, except our lab. We open on Saturday for no apparent reason. At any given time, there will be 2 students come to the lab, and they're always the same people. The same people who'll never need my assistance. I go to the lab 10:00 in the late morning and begin to sit there like a dead person. I remain near death till 4:00 p.m. and revive. I'm dead from 10 to 4... oh, even better, I'm getting paid for being dead from 10 to 4... Well, If putted this way, it sounds like a pretty damn good deal, but SATURDAY!!!

The gym opens on Friday till only 6 p.m.. My evil plan of working out on Friday after work is ruined. Yeah, this has nothing to do with what's written in the previous paragraphs. By the way, who works on Friday? The mythological creatures live in the land of working on Friday? Anyways, I wouldn't have energy to work out at that time anyway. Not after I worked to 10:30 p.m. the day before. By the way, who works in late night on Thursday? The mythological creatures live in the land of working in late night on Thursday?

Yeah...

2006-08-28T01:09:00.000-07:00

It's only the second day, though feels like forever. Living accompanied with only the vest blue sky and the vest blue ocean drives me crazy. We are creatures of the land. One of the biggest challenge is the fear and insecurity that grows from inside of you when surrounding by only water. Sailing alone......

Yeah, it's obvious now. One more reason yet that I can't keep a journal is that I don't always have something to write about. It's the second day, I'm already forcing myself to write something. The result of the forcing is this bullshit. I mean, a lonely sailer? That's just homosexual.

I couldn't think much today. Most of the thought I had today was about the freedom I'm losing for this new roommate. She's cool and friendly and surely not ugly, I have no problem with her, but my bathroom! Gosh, it looks weird with all those bottles and smells... Where my manly bathroom goes? Where? Where are you! O! manly bathroom? It used to smell like cologne... but it is no more.

I want to move out more than ever... God! Help me! Yeah, I know you're not going to help me on this... because I don't believe in you and so going to hell. In fact, I'm afraid of the church. I'm afraid of God. I'm afraid of believing in God. It's the fear of intimacy... Let's not start that again.

Anyways, nothing to write about. Tomorrow is the first day of the fucking semester. First class is at 8:00 a.m., and I'm in no mood of school. Right now, I just want to destroy stuff. In addition to that, I also want to sleep, so, go to bed, I am...

You call that a journal entry? Psh, shut up, it's mine.

2006-08-27T00:49:00.000-07:00

Many, many, many times, I couldn't remember how many times, have I tried to keep a journal but never, even once, had the attempts last for more than 3 entries. One of the reason I can think of, which took me a lot of time to figure out, is the fear of intimacy. You see, a person is supposed to be widely open and sincerely truthful when the person writes in his journal. Which means keeping a diary is a process of self-disclosure. Self-disclosure is a path to intimacy. What happens is I'm afraid that one day I'll become so attached to the journal, or become too close to my diary, and for that reason, I can't keep a journal. Seriously, that's the real reason. Lazy-as-hell-ness and shot attention span has nothing to do with it. It's the fear of intimacy,man.

I don't think anyone will be reading this except myself, but if you are reading this, you must be excessively bored (welcome to my world) , and you should believe what I say: I can't keep a journal, not because I'm lazy as hell, but simply for my fear of intimacy.

As I write/type this, a few minutes ago, I began to really think about the reason, I mean, another reason why I cannot keep a journal. The fear of intimacy is for sure, because it sounds serious enough to be a reason, and it's easy enough to bull shit about. I need some more reasons though, for fear of intimacy is hard to fix. So another reason that I can't keep a journal, I need. I think I've never thought about the reason I even keep a journal. I just thought it would be something nice to have. But this time is different, as different as any other time that I tried to keep a journal - they were all somewhat different. A person doesn't just "decide" to keep a journal. He must be hurt in a certain way (e.g. getting dumped by one's significant other) or taken some sort of damage (e.g. getting layoff) or received some kind of impact (e.g. survived a car accident). What makes this time so different is that nothing terrible really happened. I didn't get dumped (I'm single...). I'm still employed. No car is crashed, and my house is nice and not on fire. I just think... um... it'll... be.. nice... to keep... a journal... yeah...

Too many thoughts fly through my restless mind every fucking day. Many of the thoughts retains in my mind, but also, plenty of them are gone. The idea is to keep as much thought as possible. Who knows, someday this journal may become something that actually worth to read. I don't expect much from this journal. In fact, I don't expect anything from it. It can be as trashy as a piece of trash, or eventually become a treasure. Who knows.

Oh, by the way, my walking-around-the-house-in-my-underwear days officially end today since the tenant moved in. I was astonished to see so many girly stuff in the restroom an hour ago when I got home. The restroom used to be mine... MINE!!! It's a precious space where a man can truly express himself... and now... it's gone... so sad.

Hmm... End of Holiday

2006-01-08T22:22:00.000-08:00

So, this is the end of the holiday, or is it a new beginning? Hmm... no, I still think it's just the end of holiday...

Apparently, this blog has become a per-semester entry thing. I can never figure out how people can keep a diary like everyday, they must be living in some sort of wonderland.

New year resolution: a girl friend wouldn't hurt, and uh... that's pretty much it... dammit!

又提到人類...

2005-10-20T18:38:00.000-07:00

常常有人喜歡說人類如何如何不該不該死死死，在網路上大放厥詞。數分鐘前我又看到一篇類似的文章。
有人提到因為禽流感，政府集中撲殺鳥類，接著又牽扯到人類如何該死以及畜牧業農夫。
我看到提到畜牧業，反射性的就想回下面的第一段，回著回著竟然就歸納出人類不該死的結論了：

----------------

說到殺豬...
我覺得應該廢除所有畜牧業，改開放狩獵區。
想吃肉的自己進去打，不過只能帶自制的刀械類的武器禁止攜帶槍砲。
狩獵區裡也不一定會出現甚麼動物...也可能有Halloween special。

這樣可以解決很多問題，包括讓不少偏激分子無話可說。

我也不完全否認Fayever的觀點，有一陣子我也認為如果政府廢除所有醫療金費可以解決許多問題：高齡化，人口爆炸，沒錢，等等...
不過如果林北（更正：你親愛的父親，其中「你」，「親愛的」，跟「父親」三點缺一不可。）在你面前奄奄一息的說著他的遺言，或是你摯愛的兄弟（一樣，三點缺一不可。）得了絕症，神情絕望的抓著你的衣襟，一邊掙扎一邊喊著「我不想死！」，喊到最後終於筋疲力竭的跪倒在地上，實在是很難一句「so what? Survival the fittest, 你可以去死了。」，然後一腳把他踹倒在地上，順便吐口痰。
為了減少這種慘劇的發生，人們決定控制疫情：「撲殺鳥，因為鳥類會散佈禽流感，增加悲劇的發生。」這是「感性」的決定，不是「理性」。你的「理性」告訴我們自私的為了自己而撲殺動物是不對的，不過人的「感性」（野性）卻認為不是你死就是我生，所以應該殺光他們。生存的原動力是「慾望」，也就是「野性」，不是「理性」，所以最後是「感性」戰勝「理性」了。下場：集體撲殺，慘不忍睹。

常言道，人類跟其他動物的區別在於「理性」。沒了「理性」，人也「跟禽獸沒兩樣」。
（你拿到我的點了嗎？）

常常聽到有人（是「有人」，不是「某人」，謝謝。）說甚麼「人類不該活在世上」啦，「違背自然」啦... 我想，他們活得這麼不該，怎麼沒有集體自殺？想著想著又回到同樣的結論：感性戰勝理性：理性說：人活得不自然，不該。感性卻說：我要活下去。最後他們也只好放棄理性，靠著原始的本能，如禽獸般的活下去。

Beware of deadly Oxygen

2005-09-16T21:42:00.000-07:00

"Oxygen is a very toxic gas and an extreme fire hazard. It is fatal in
concentrations of as little as 0.000001 p.p.m. Humans exposed to the
oxygen concentrations die within a few minutes. Symptoms resemble very
much those of cyanide poisoning (blue face, etc.). In higher
concentrations, e.g. 20%, the toxic effect is somewhat delayed and it
takes about 2.5 billion inhalations before death takes place. The reason
for the delay is the difference in the mechanism of the toxic effect of
oxygen in 20% concentration. It apparently contributes to a complex
process called aging, of which very little is known, except that it is
always fatal.

However, the main disadvantage of the 20% oxygen concentration is in the
fact it is habit forming. The first inhalation (occurring at birth) is
sufficient to make oxygen addiction permanent. After that, any
considerable decrease in the daily oxygen doses results in death with
symptoms resembling those of cyanide poisoning.

Oxygen is an extreme fire hazard. All of the fires that were reported in
the continental U.S. for the period of the past 25 years were found to be
due to the presence of this gas in the atmosphere surrounding the buildings
in question.

Oxygen is especially dangerous because it is odorless, colorless and
tasteless, so that its presence can not be readily detected until it is
too late.
-- Chemical & Engineering News February 6, 1956"

Final Grade...

2005-05-17T20:28:00.000-07:00

今天微積分期末考前在教室門口遇到雇用我幫他改作業的教授...

教授T：那個... John, 你來一下...

我：hi

教授T：我不知道怎麼回事...不過我覺得你好像沒搞清楚我請你登記作業最後總分的方法...

我：沒有吧？

教授T：告訴我你做了什麼...

我：我把每個學生最低的五次作業成績去掉，其他全部加起來，除以168，乘以100...

教授T：啊！果然，應該是除以188。

我：可是你給我的指示上是說除以168啊。

教授T：嗯...可能是我寫錯了，難怪我說奇怪，我的學生怎麼會連作業的分數都這麼低，不過我已經快調整好了，不用你...

我：等等，如果是除以188應該會更低才對...

教授T：嗯？好像是這樣，不過隨便，我還是覺得不可思議，我的學生怎麼會...從來沒看過有一整班作業的分數會都這麼低的...

我：是你叫我改嚴一點的啊...

教授T：......

我：哪你要我重新登記一次分數嗎？我寫了一個程式用來算總分，稍微把168改成188就可以了，很快的...

教授T：嗯...不用了，我自己快改好了...

（好像改太嚴了XD）

遺失重要文件...

2005-04-06T21:44:00.000-07:00

遺失物品，特別是重要文件，似乎成為我生命中不可缺少的一部份。
所謂重要的文件，通常就是一些隔天就要交的，今天還沒準備的東西。

數個週之前有一個欺天支架和一個七天之假期...名曰春假。
假期之後有兩份作業要交，想當然耳，最後一天才會動工。
怎知到了最後一日，環視房間四處，但見：
廢紙廢紙廢廢紙，吠指廢紙非廢紙。
飛紙廢紙非是紙，狒狒狒狒狒狒紙。
究竟上面那首七言絕句是怎麼回事？就是房裡充滿著廢紙，
我原天真的以為那廢紙堆裡也有我要找的那張紙，
導致那些廢紙並不只是廢紙。
沒想到那張我要找的紙並不在廢紙堆裡，
所以他們仍然只是廢紙。
究竟為什麼我房間裡會有狒狒？而且還被提到了三次？
等我想到可以接受的理由再解釋吧...

所幸那堂課十一點才開始，
使我有機會能一大早跑去學校跟教授要一張作業單趕出來。
誰料今天又發生這種可悲的事情？
同一堂課，同樣是假期之後要交的東西，同樣是最後一天才動工，
同樣的，作業單被遺失了。
更悲哀的是，這次遺失的是一份take-home exam，
顧名思義，
就是一部份讓你拿回家做的考試其中讓你拿回家做的那一部份。
這一部份佔了25%。你說，25%而已，其他部份滿分就好啦！
雖然其他部份我大概也會滿分，不過75%並無法滿足我的虛榮心。
也就是說，又得早起去跟同一個教授討作業單...
希望不會扣印象分數/希望印象分數不要佔總分90%。

Log blog是為了好玩，故不能這樣就結束，所以... 再隨便說點什麼好了。

記得第一次我去跟教授要作業單的時候，我說：
"Uh... Do you have a copy of the assignment schedule?"
教授說：
"I certainly do. Did you lost yours?"
我就說：
"No, I didn't lost it, I just can't find it anywhere."

我沒弄丟，只是到處都找不到而已...
這種可悲的藉口也邊得出來？
這就好像有人問微軟說為什麼我把.doc檔案加密之後，
不用Word，改用Word pad就可以不用密碼直接修改？
MS回答說這不是bug，而是word新的"feature"，
所以請在能互相信任的情況下使用加密功能...

............

此門上的鎖其實只是裝飾品，請在沒小偷的地方斟酌使用。
本衣服其實並無遮蓋作用，請在四周沒人會看你的時候斟酌穿著。
此馬桶沖水功能僅能將糞便稀釋，請在您是不在乎糞便噁心的人時斟酌使用。

不，其實我的理由跟以上這些理由的程度是不一樣的，
我只是想順便宣傳一下微軟編的這個爛到快被分解成原子的藉口而已。

4. 機車的

2005-04-01T22:44:00.000-08:00

這是我在某個地方提出的一個問題：

===================
我有點好奇...
===
“乓！！！”椅子，桌子，她的背包，和她的筆記本異震源同狀聲詞地說。
是的，她的背包可以媲美我高中時的背包。
在我旁邊，她如犀牛般憤怒的吐息，如卡車般巨大的身影，真的很可怕...
“乓！乓！乓！舥鈀葩趴蚆芭蚆！”隨著她拿出書、筆、翻開書，書、筆、桌子，又異震源同狀聲詞地說。
===

對於這一段的用詞和句型，你的看法是：
-1. 不爽的
0. 爽的
1. 複雜的
2. 難懂的
3. 易懂的
4. 機車的
5. 其他：____________
=====================

毫不留情地，我得到的答案似乎是"....4"。

『隨著她拿出書、筆、翻開書，書、筆、桌子，又異震源同狀聲詞地說。』
『異震源同狀聲詞』很明顯是『異口同聲』的變形，
用來滿足前後文的需求。
書、筆、桌子皆無口，發出的聲波聽起來雖不同，卻可以用相同的狀聲詞描述。
既然如此，『異震源同狀聲詞』是不是比『異口同聲』來的貼切的多了？

我常常會故意/不小心/不得已地寫出這樣的句子，
通常會這樣寫是因為我覺得這樣比較準確，
或是注音輸入法耍白爛，
導致我想跟著耍白爛，
或是突然想到微軟陰謀，導致我想寫出不正常的文章。

不管是什麼原因，當這種有點怪，可是還蠻不能說他錯的句子出現時，
我希望他被讀時讀的人的感覺是...
祕密選項：
π. 沒錯的

咦？ 5.其他：____________也錯嗎？
當然錯，標點方式完全錯誤。
請問“其他冒號底線底線底線底線底線底線底線底線底線底線底線底線”代表的是什麼感覺？
選項5.語意不明，再怎麼選也不可能選這個選項。
所以如果你下次考試的時候遇到像這樣的題目：

填空格：
請在空格中填入適當的答案。

N(約第6.022x10^23題). 太陽的直徑約為_______________________埃。（取至小數點後第二位）

請不要自作聰明地在題目中殘缺的句子裡的底線的上面填上任何東西，
因為他沒有叫你這麼做。
更不要在題目中殘缺的句子裡的底線上面填入能使題目中殘缺地句子為真的字，
因為沒有人叫你這麼做。

他要你做的是：
『在（其實不存在的）“空格”中填入（不知道什麼問題的）適當的“答案”。』
題目中的空格不存在，以類似的姿態存在的是一堆底線。
答案也不存在，因為題目中根本沒有問句，
有的是一個殘破的肯定句，而且通常重點部份會被底線取代。

這是陷阱題！正確的答案應該是φ！
大部分沒有仔細讀題目的學生都會以為題目是：

『換底線：
『請用適當地字取代題目中的底線，使題目中原本殘缺的句子為真。』

不過這樣就中了變態又邪惡的出題老師的計了！
不過，我們都知道的，
老師們常常會為了避免全校的成績都爛得一塌糊塗，
而在成績上動手腳。
也就是說，大部分的情況下，
那些因為沒有讀清楚題目解釋而在底線上面填入了能使題目中殘缺的句子為真的字的笨學生在校方不得已的情況下得到了分數，
而犧牲了那些因為讀了題目，看穿了出題老師卑鄙的陷阱而沒有在底線上面填入任何東西的的天才學生的成績。
不被了解的天才們得到了零分，被同學藐視，被世人恥笑，
最後終於被孤立，經常是十多歲就走上了自殺一途。
他們寧願死，也不願意活的像個無能的人。

是的，這種語意不明的東西害死了無數的天才。
如果所有出題老師都能夠注意用語的話，這個世界可能早就是新人類的世界了。
或許光合作用車早就能被發明了。（無污染，不用燃料，釋放氧氣。）
或許人們早就能互相偵測腦波了。
或許，世界早就能夠放棄戰爭了。
或許我們早就能符合參加“寰宇高智能生命體聯盟”的最低門檻了。

為了世界的未來，宇宙的和平，以及地球人在宇宙中的地位，
我們是不是應該檢討既有的，不太能夠準確的描述語意的說話方式，
而考慮更有彈性，更具發展性，更能符合未來需求的用語呢？

---
換底線：
請用適當地字取代題目中的底線，使題目中原本殘缺的句子能準確的描述讀者對前文的感受。

1. _的，真_爛。

超級系...

2005-03-30T23:51:00.000-08:00

今天下午在學校幫教授改作業的時候，
突然一位十七八歲的妙齡少女進了教室。
因為教室裡已經人滿為患了，
（也就是每張四人用的桌子都各坐了一個人了。）
他東張西望一陣子，就只好跟我合用一桌了。
一般這種情況都是會坐對角線的的，為了避免不必要的面對面，
也能最有效的利用桌子的空間，不過...她竟然坐到我旁邊了！
她好像是用跑的來的，一邊喘氣，一邊很快的把書包裡的書和筆拿出來。
一般這種情況下我應該要唱欱叻甪雃（又稱讚美主），可是我並沒有...
我感到心跳加速，但，微弱，這是...害怕的心跳？
========================================================
名詞解釋：
超級系 - 皮厚，血多，攻擊力強，運動性低，命中率-40。
適合丟到戰場前線當肉盾，或強襲部隊。

========================================================
這位十七八歲的雌性生物，長度大約是我的1.04倍，
橫切面積大約是我的三到四倍（深寬各約兩倍），
HP跟power應該有我的十倍，MP可能是0。

因為我今天坐的是面對著門，所以她一進來我就看到了。
看到她第一個閃過我腦海的印象是
“Big Show跟Shaquille O'Neal融合之後再跟最強的女摔角手融合。”
所以她一進教室我就感覺到壓力了...
進門時，因為自動門開的太慢，她用手把門用力打開了。
“碰”，地板說，隨著她踏進門來“！碰！”
“趴！啪！葩！啪！舥！”鍵盤說“鈀！舥！”
儘管第三者觀察會認為她認為用力按鍵盤會讓電腦速度變快，
不過網路還是很慢。（進教室要登入）

接著她如猛獸般的，有著極重的腳步地，甩頭如狂牛地，而且豪邁地四處張望，找位子。
終於，她發現我的桌子好像比其他桌子大一點...

“會被”我心裡想“殺！”

就是從這時候開始我的心跳從正常心跳變成微弱而急促的心跳...

她走到我旁邊，
“乓！！！”椅子，桌子，她的背包，和她的筆記本異震源同狀聲詞地說。
是的，她的背包可以媲美我高中時的背包。
在我旁邊，她如犀牛般憤怒的吐息，如卡車般巨大的身影，真的很可怕...
“乓！乓！乓！舥鈀葩趴蚆芭蚆！”隨著她拿出書，筆，翻開書，書，筆，桌子，又異震
源同狀聲詞地說。

可憐的書被拿出來了，也被打開了。
她把那粗壯如冬瓜般的手臂放在桌上，
“芭擦”一聲，把我原本以為離她八丈遠的，我還沒改的那疊作業弄得亂七八糟。
俗語說得好，是食物者莫浪費，識時務者為俊傑。
身為君子/人類的我，能屈/彎曲能伸/伸展。
不跟她一般見識，便把那疊作業移到我的前方，並重新整理好。
但她的花招還沒完。
我差不多還有十份作業沒改的時候，突然一震天搖地動，威震八方。氣壯山河，賽泰山。
一枝小小可憐的橡皮擦筆，就這樣被當作物品般的使用。
完全沒有考慮到橡皮擦，桌子，和可憐的我的處境...
擦完之後，她匉的一聲，似憤非憤地把的橡皮擦筆重重的敲到桌上，
然後右手化拳為掌，意圖把橡皮屑揮走。
誰料她這只右手，又豈是泛泛之輩？伸手一揮！像芭蕉扇一般，怎見得？有詩為證，
詩曰：

勇女單手遮日星，力拔山兮萬人驚。
芭蕉巨扇滅燃山，不敵勇女掌風行。

橡皮擦筆“麤！”的一聲，應聲而飛！飛向我放到前面的那疊作業，又弄亂了！
原以為危急已過，誰料她又化掌為爪，伸手一抓，把橡皮擦筆抓回，又再化為掌，
她像是不滿第一擊的威力，又像是挑釁般的，
緊接著的第二擊更是氣勢如洪！鬼哭神號！
鬼神之力，哪遜張飛張義德？力拔山兮，更勝遠古泰山神!
但見：
猛將單掌力蓋世，擦屑未淨，只見筆桿，一筆衝向九宵雲天外！
怎見得？有詩為證，詩曰：

一掌之後又一掌，撼動江湖千載長。掌風吹散廬山霧，蛟龍現身無處藏。
再擊劈開黃河長，大禹看了並不爽。甚差最末此三句，作者文思並不長。

橡皮擦筆再次飛出，這麼一飛，飛到了不可思議的距離！
旁人但見，怎能想像僅是揮走橡皮屑之力？

我見狀，意識到我的生命受到威脅，此地不宜久留。
留得青山在，不怕沒柴燒。
還有七八份作業，在外面改，頂多吹吹風，也不會丟了性命。
便草草收拾，如鼠輩般，竄逃而去...

天使的幻想，神奇的夢境。

2004-09-24T20:39:00.000-07:00

好久好久以前
                有好多好多的故事
              說了又說
              講了又講
              怎麼也說不完

              好久好久以前
                有好多好多的故事
                聽了又聽
                看了又看
                怎麼也不厭煩

              天使的幻想神奇的夢境
                陌生的國度美麗的情竟
                穿越了時空縮短了距離
                青蛙變王子
                公主正在呼喚你

              多年多年以後
              依然有好多的故事
              說了又說
              講了又講
              還是說不完

看這個節目的時候真的是好久好久以前啊...

久到我都懷疑那段時間，那些事情真的發生過。

free stuff, free lunch free iPod?

2004-09-09T21:06:00.000-07:00

免費iPod...
這真的是網路上免費送Ipod的活動？

錯！當然不是，免費送的是iPod，不是Ipod，請不要搞錯了。

這個活動是AOL, eBay, Blockbuster等知名公司提供的好康活動，
基本的規則就是你要把你的地址出賣給他，參加他提供的其中一項服務，
有免費的，也有可能要shipping and handling fee的，
頂多大概花個十塊多美金，最後抓五個人來作一樣的事，
他就送你一台iPod，iPod mini, 或250塊iTunes Music Store禮券。

網路上這種東西騙人的似乎很多，我剛看到的時候也不敢確定這是真的還是假的，
不過Wired.com已經發新聞搞確認了，所以應該不會是騙人的。

那，你一毛都沒花，憑什麼他送iPod給你？
事實上這是一種行銷手法，
有效名單對美國公司來說是非常值錢的，
你參加了這項活動，不但他們確定你給的名單是有效的，
同時還能確定你參加其中一項活動，
還能再抓五個人的有效名單，
簡單來說，你就是把你的名字地址跟你五個朋友的名字地址以一台iPod的價錢賣給他。
這看來應該是無害的，可能會收到一些垃圾信...

不過一台iPod換幾封垃圾信...划算啊。
有興趣的可以按下面的連結：
http://www.freeiPods.com/default.aspx?referer=8783822